We need to move the needle on parental leave

America can do better.

Ever heard of “Golden Handcuffs”? It’s a term that refers to a financial benefit that keeps employees at their current company instead of pursuing other opportunities outside of the company. 

Never in my professional career did I have to think about things like benefits or maternity leave, because they simply didn’t exist. But now that I’ve had a taste of what it's like to actually be taken care of by an employer, I now know what those golden handcuffs are all about.

Let me tell you… they are heavy… and getting tight. 

At this point in my career, I’m ready for advancement. If it doesn’t happen for me at my current employer, I will need to look elsewhere. I’m also in my mid-thirties with a two-year-old and plans to make him a big brother. The struggle is real every day. Do I choose my career and make a move to a new company? If I do, what’s their maternity leave policy? Do they even have one? What about daycare or an additional benefit to help offset the cost?

“The struggle is real every day. Do I choose my career and make a move to a new company? If I do, what’s their maternity leave policy? Do they even have one? What about daycare or an additional benefit to help offset the cost? ”

I’m one of the lucky ones whose company actually offers those awesome benefits I noted above, but my company offers them on their own volition. Believe it or not, the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development shows that the US is dead last of all industrialized nations when it comes to government entitlements to paid maternity leave.

Last time I checked, it's 2019.

Women are leading and creating companies, running for president and still doing all the things in the home. 

So why can’t our laws keep up? 

Before 1993, there was no guarantee that a new mother would have a job once she came back to work after having a child. It wasn’t until President Bill Clinton signed the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA), which allows up to 12 weeks of unpaid, job-protected time off. Nearly three decades later, it remains the only federal protection that guarantees leave to workers — of any gender — to recover from a serious medical condition, provide care for a seriously ill family member, or care for a new child, and it still only applies to some employees. 

As if being pregnant and having to prove you are not disabled isn’t stressful enough, most women have to figure out how the hell they can afford to not get paid for three months while having another mouth to feed. Formula is expensive and breastfeeding mothers get hangry fast. 

Some new moms will try to hold their sick and vacation time until after their babies are born so they can still get a paycheck to offset part of their FMLA leave. But, if they are one of the estimated 10.5 million workers that the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics considers an independent contractor, the benefits mentioned above simply don’t exist. And if you’re an hourly employee who only gets a few days off for PTO or worse, only makes a paycheck when you’re in the building working, you are essentially screwed when you have to take time away.

No work, no pay.

These women often return to work just days or weeks after having a baby, no matter how difficult the delivery.

After my c-section, I spent one week in the hospital, another at home on bed rest, and was not able to drive for another two weeks. If it were not for my husband’s vacation time, I don’t know what we would have done. While our situation might not be the norm, the need for a partner’s involvement is essential during this time of healing. 

What about the men?

Unfortunately, due to old-school beliefs that men should be the primary breadwinners, new fathers are still missing out on precious time to support their partners and bond with their children right from the start. A recent Deloitte study shows that 57% of men felt that taking parental leave would be perceived as a lack of commitment to their jobs and be a step backward in their careers. 

Cue the most epic eye roll of all time.

Thankfully, it looks like change might be on the horizon. More and more large companies are realizing they need to put their money where their mouths are to attract and keep young talent, while elected officials are offering solutions around paid leave leading up to the 2020 election. 

One thing is for sure, women will only be treated equally in business when men are treated as equal caregivers at home. We can and should do better.